Thursday, May 23, 2013

hello, crazy

Oh. I didn't see you there.
Been a long time, gorgeous.
[ wink, wink ]

Alright, enough of the sucking up to the internet masses.
I know, I know.
I haven't been around,
It's been forever since I've posted,
I am the essence of inconsistency,
The worst blogger in the history of ever,
Blah, blah, blahbitty blah.
No excuses.
I honestly don't care much. Though I did miss it.
But having no easy access to wifi or any real free time made it much easier to forget that I missed it.

Fifteen second update.
Yep. And, go!

Sunday, March 04, 2012

got a second? life update condensed

newsy new news
[the good kind]
firstly, all you lovely people
life is crazy and busy and i never have free time
[i.e. logging a minimum of 50 hours a week at both jobs]
and my apartment does not have internet
so posts will be few and far between

but on to the news
i am on day 16 of a 21 day fast
it has been challenging, inspirational and fairly revealing
which is basically vegan
plus no-sugar, no-leavened-bread, no-alcohol, no-caffeine
let me tell you
it is tough
[especially since 40 of those work hours are at a coffee shop]
but hey
where there is no sacrifice, there is no growth
or reward

and also on this note
these last few weeks have tweaked my interest in veganism
the transition wasn't as difficult as i expected
giving up milk and red meat was a cake walk
cheese and eggs, not so much
but since i've already cleaned out my pantry and fridge
might as well stick to the path and see what happens
[and i've lost ten pounds. yeah, baby]
vegan no-sugar chocolate cupcakes
extremely delicious topped with just sliced strawberries

in other news
i have a game plan and my focus straight ahead
it's back to school i go
four semesters left at the most
and this girl will have her diploma
and a bare minimum of debt
cheers for being broke as only twenty-somethings can be

PS the boy and i celebrate our one year anniversary this coming friday
[insert giggle of happiness here]
i will hopefully get a chance to blog especially for that

until next time, lovelies
happy sunday

much love,

Wednesday, February 01, 2012

new is always better

resolutions are lame
life changing decisions are hardcore
the difference between the two?
the follow through
stick it out
trust me, the bragging rights are worth it

with all that clarified
here are some of my recent life changing decisions
[and the reason for why i chose each one]

firstly. to be fit&healthy
please don't scoff
i'm not talking about skinny bikini body dream lust
i'm thinking of
being able to keep up a crazy busy schedule without fainting from fatigue
and avoiding potential medical issues down the road
i'm referring to
being careful what i eat because every fatty fried bite matters
and being mindful of my priorities concerning my free time
i'm talking about my health
because today at work, i watched a forty-year old woman
spend an entire two minutes panting after walking five steps
from the bathroom to her shopping cart
let me reemphasize this point
forty. five steps. panting. for two whole minutes.
is this an example of me?
am i close?
not in the slightest
can that life sneak up on even the best of us?
i choose health

...also on that note
Arbonne is addicting for all the best reasons
and every muscle in my body aches from a killer workout
at Balance Fitness Studio
and i'm sure tomorrow morning will be much much worse

stay tuned
for my other recent commitments
[and my fitness adventures]
blogging has not been a high priority as late
which i'm sure ya'll knew
[especially if you glance down at my previous post' date]
but one of my decisions has been to be better
keep me accountable, please

much love

PS i will love you forever if you know
who the awesome person  the title quote comes from

Monday, November 07, 2011

and i try not to dream

i haven't had the days that i thought i would
and i'm not moving toward the future
i thought i wanted
life is unexpected
if it wasn't
making the journey would be only tedious walking in a straight line
and there is no adventure in that kind of traveling
twists and turns and pits full of furiously starving tigers
that is life

i've got a few things on my mind
but i am tired
tired from a somewhat frustrating job
that barely pays the bills
which i never seem to be able to get the better of
no matter how many pennies i throw in a jar
sometimes giving up and just lying down
and curling up in a thick quilt
and shutting my eyes and my ears and my consciousness
to the reality that living is hard
is the only way i get by

i am not depressed
but i am weary

there are three very important things
i wanted to share with you lovelies

my swankiest discovery of the last month?
it is freaking fantastic
and for all you beauty&photography whores out there
as well as the crafty-craft artists
it's just the right addiction 

i keep promising i won't leave you guys
that my desertion was temporary
and i'm horribly sorry
and that it will never ever ever happen again
but here's my secret
i lied
and this time
i'm not going to promise to stay or leave
or blog daily or weekly or bi-weekly
or anything
i am here now
and next time i blog, well then i'm back

i started a new blog
it will be about all the crazy lovely heartache thrilling changes
in this girl's life
ya'll won't get the address to it
quite yet
be patient
but know that it is coming very soon
and it's awesome spice

happy monday, my lovelies

chasing pirates
[norah jones]

PS i love her boots. and those bottles. and her adorable hair.
and that apartment.
fine, i love everything about this music video

Monday, August 29, 2011

homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto

the battles we fight
are never just our battles
they are more than that, to us, to others
a battle to find the right words to say
when something horrid has happened and all the air leaves a room
and your best friend is staring at you
lost and scared and you have nothing
not even a simple word to offer her
when you scream rage at your mother
because it isn't what she said it's what she meant
and all the little insults over years and years
have damaged you
and you realize that trust and love don't always coexist
when you watch the news and see people dying
children fighting
governments silent
your heart breaking and numb
but if those battles were not just their battles but yours
if humanity acted out of character and fought for survival of all
what kind of world would that be
if any world at all?
i speak not to you but to myself
how many times do i forget others and turn inward
one's own head is always filled with the loudest problems
it is the best place to hide
and the quickest place to lose sight of what is true
there is always an enemy
always an ally
just make sure you can tell which is which
before you choose who to die beside
 *   *   *

by Suzanne Collins

[if you dare watch the film before reading the Trilogy, kindly unfollow me]

Sunday, August 28, 2011

words are only letters and sounds and oxygen

there is something no longer heavy weighing on my soul
the darkness that had stopped my words is gone
and they are flowing in a torrential flood
fast and heavy and unstoppable
the sunlight is back and the way is clear
  i can feel life in me again
the words have reawakened me
brought strength back to my weary bones
and glorious hope into the way i look at this world
the world that surrounds me
and the one inside my head
there are new things that i did not see before
they must have shown up when i was not looking
now off to discover what bright new curiosities

i do not think you realize how sacred writing is to you
reading as well
but writing makes you happy
and you haven't been happy in a long time
[paraphrased from conversations with honey]

thank you
for seeing past the murkiness of exhaustion and bad moods
for knowing who i am and who i was and who i still could be
for holding on when it was difficult
and for being exactly who you are

oh and also
happy birthday to me

Friday, April 29, 2011

these cloud-shaped marshmallows

i can feel my heart exploding
emotions roiling and rolling
a storm over the ocean in such heights of ectasy
acoustic guitar
and a melodious voice speaking truth
music is not complicated
and in its simplicity it invokes the complexity of emotion
happiness or such an infinite sadness
but authentic deeply felt emotion nevertheless
be at peace
[and allow an industry promoting untalented 'artists' to crumble and die]

i could apologize for the lengthy absence
but as much as i've missed this and you
the break was muchly needed
so i will only apologize with half the sincerity
[if that is even possible]
there is much to be caught up upon
new job. more boy. moving soon. life
but that is coming soon
for tonight
i am listening to the soothing coffee house musicians
and spilling my guts into a freshly turned journal
stay tuned
and i promise to return to you

kudos to we heart it